A win and a loss plus peas on the knees.

So I went on the treadmill at work and knocked out the 5.25 miles. It wasn't easy and my inner whiner was being really loud from miles 2 to 3. It was nice being able to watch shows on my iPhone. I ended up watching the LOST Pilot part 1 and some of part 2. I love that show so much. I started to get emotional during the first five minutes. True LOST fans will understand.

So anyway, big win! I drove home and was famished. So hungry! I thought I had a game plan for dinner but I thought wrong.

I got in the kitchen and tried to think what would be fast. I had spelt pretzels and hummus. I took a pre-portioned container of hummus that we get for John to bring to work. Turns out it was 4 points and if you add the pretzels there was 6. All my points...

I felt ravenous and thought "I can't just eat that!" So I had 1oz of sliced turkey (1) and then made an Amys veggie burger on a sandwich thin (1).

In addition to this I had some carrots with mustard (0) but the next grab is what killed me.

The evil dark chocolate. Generally I am okay with dark chocolate in the house. Well tonight I took a 1/4th of the bar I picked this weekend. Okay, fine, wanted something sweet...then I went back for more. I ate half the bar which clocked in at 5 points. Fuck. My. Life.

I am typing this now to vent because I feel sad, ashamed and like I've failed.

I did a run for nothing? No, I know that isn't true. I built my endurance and my body is burning fat more efficiently (thank god). I just feel disappointed.

Week after week I say "This week I am going to stay in my daily points!" and I've yet to do that.

Sure, I have 5 WAP left for the week and have 13 activity points untouched but it still sucks.

I think this next week I'm going to post my daily points in here. Maybe if I feel accountable to you guys it will help me.

Does anyone have advice for what to do when you're feeling exhausted and famished after a long run and need to eat? I guess planning is key and I was sort of winging it.

Back when I was doing my best on WW and losing mostly every week I was too far on the other side. I remember eating chocolate one night and trying to make myself throw up. I couldn't and was so upset. So I went to the gym for the second time that day to burn off more points. That isn't healthy. I never made that behavior a habit but even though I was losing I wasn't in a good place either.

I need to find a good in between place.

Oh, I almost forgot, I'm about to put a bag of peas on my knees and ice them. They hurt. :(